Story and photo by Robin Jaj.

Tanzania, where shall I even begin. Housing the world’s largest game reserve with the biggest animal migration and home to Mt. Kilimanjaro – Africa’s highest mountain, it’s only natural to head over to Tanzania to experience true safari. We spent five days at the Serengeti Safari Park, four days at Zanzibar Island and a day at the capital of Tanzania, Dar Es Salaam. Here are the highlights.

On day one while on our way to Arusha, we got caught up with these chickens on the run!

Upon arrival at Maasai Village, we were greeted by these beautiful colours of Africa.

The women of Maasai are tough and strong. They collect wood and water. They fix broken huts,  mend the fences and earn a living by selling hand-made jewelleries.

Much to our surprise, this is a school and it’s the only area at the village which is not fenced from wild animals.

I love the composition of this tree with birds nests hanging from it.

The hippos and crocs have a pact to live together in harmony.

See how happy this hippo was….

Now, if only humans can learn from all these wild animals.

I caught this image just before he gobbled down his fresh kill.

My favourite moment of the whole trip was definitely the lioness hunting. They are not just chase-and-kill type of animals. They are really fun hunters to watch. They have a strategy to the hunt and yet just pure brute force of the kill.

This lioness is clearly oblivious to our presence as soon as she spotted a buffalo on the other side of the field.

Their male counterparts were equally entertaining.

They are known to mate 20 times a day!!!!!

Usually a few minutes each time.

But that’s still heck load of quickies! 20 times a day multiplied by 30 days, that makes it 600 times a month!

WHO’S YOUR DADDY !?!

Travel Tips:

We stayed in lodges for the safari, the best is to search online and see what suits your budget. As for Zanzibar, we stayed close to Stone Town (main city in Zanzibar). We travelled around the island in a rented car. Tbe beaches on the east side of Zanzibar are beautiful.

Do your research well as different times of the year will showcase different types of animals. Know what you want to do and where you want to go. Get a proper book on the animals in the safari. A good driver/guide for the safari is also essential.

Immerse in their culture. Bargain for anything that is sold on the streets.

Don’t forget your Malaria medication. Drink loads of water as one can get dehydrated. Bring loads of sun screen!

And most importantly, be one with nature and do away with technology (toilets and camera excluded from that category!)

A lot of men shallowly thrive on the numbers, attempting in vain to out-do the ‘fictitious’ achievements of their peers. As incompetence is relatively unacceptable among the male gender, these specimens try very hard to live by the motto “the more the merrier”.

In today’s generation, sex is supposedly an open topic.

There was a time when talking about sex was very much a taboo.

Malaysian females in general still fear of being labelled. So yes, many of us do talk openly about sex but not self-admittingly.

Why? Again, the gender bias.

Men fuck around and TALK a whole lot of COCK about their bedroom achievements just as if they’d be awarded a trophy for every woman they successfully slept with.

Women on the other hand prefer to keep mum or just talk less. They’d likely be crowned a “slut” other wise. That is, if society got to know. However, how the hell would such info leak have happened if the female didn’t tell? Obviously someone wasn’t very good at kept HIS big mouth shut!

A lot of men shallowly thrive on the numbers, attempting in vain to out-do the ‘fictitious’ achievements of their peers. As incompetence is relatively unacceptable among the male gender, these specimens try very hard to live by the motto “the more the merrier”. Pressured to outnumber, many choose the “plus equation”. Commonly adding a bogus 3 to the actual figure.

Women prefer to keep low profile and tend to opt for the “minus equation”. See, 5 minus 3 equals 2. Sounds good?

Now what about 3 minus 3. Total = “Uh, I’m a virgin..”? Sounds ridiculous?

That is somewhat evident that in mathematics, men score better at addition and women at subtraction.

That’s just elementary maths. Rest assured that some overly-ambitious jokers who fancy double-digits are prone to exist, aptly known as advanced level cock talkers.

There is still much room for improvement. After all, Malaysia is a developing country. Who knows, maybe one fine day we’ll be as open as the Brits. There is a saying that goes, “If COCK can talk, then PUSSY can sing!!”. Now, how about that for a change!

Tampons are by far, one of the best creations by mankind, ever. Its about freedom of expression. Confidence. And no worrying about leaks. A girl can insert as many tampons as she wishes into her pussy in her lifetime without having to worry about being labelled a slut.

My girlfriend uses sanitary pads. Now, how stone-aged could that be? Be made aware that there are many obstinate women out there who still prefer their caves padded.